North Indian Marriages

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Time to time I get a chance to attend a typical north Indian marriage which is more of a carnival. It’s a festival where around thousand people gather to celebrate that beautiful moment of a couple’s life – Marriage. Ironically half of the people invited don’t even know what the hell are they doing there.

People spend a lot on these marriages. From that awesome decoration to bride’s lehenga, lakhs and crores of money is spent now a days. Every single thing has to be special and unique. There are plenty of food items for the guests. But there are some dishes like Soola Paneer and Dum Aloo (Power Potato) which instead of watering your mouth makes you more fearful of the food.

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As a guest, you have to give a Shagun (Blessing) to the wedding pair. It is more of like an entry ticket to the festival. And based on the closeness with the girl’s parents and your social status in the society, the amount in that shagun increases.

Whenever there is a wedding in a family, it’s a dream come true for all the little ones in the family. I remember meeting all my cousins and spending time with them for around 10 days. We actually didn’t care about whose marriage it was. But yes there was a fight amongst some of us to sit with the groom on that horse. However, the one sitting ultimately leads to getting bored. We kid have our own small little games going on. Trying every single food item, competition of who will drink more glasses of Pepsi, playing pranks on each other and what not.

Then there is a place in the corner, a boon for all the drunkards – free beer at the BAR. One who has not even tasted the Teacher’s in his life will go for Chivas Regal in that marriage. The professional bartenders are hired to make cocktails, but the drinkers don’t have any idea about the Black Jack, The Amber moon or the Irish coffee. All they want is soda with the whiskey, that’s all to make their day of a perfect marriage.

How can I forget the worthy DJ managing the dance floor who always play the same fucked up Honey Singh songs using the virtual DJ. Who plays the song “blue eyes” when the groom is to arrive.

And now here comes the groom, with that small kid sitting with him, and crazy family members dancing in the front. He knows very well that this is the last night he can have some fun. But still keeping that wonderful smile on his face like he is the happiest man alive, he moves on. The real victims can understand his deep down fears very well and feel pity for him.

Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right and the other is the husband.

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There is a fixed dance in every marriage and every one of us got an opportunity to encounter that and some lucky people like me had a chance to do that as well. NAAGIN DANCE – yes this snake dance is a setup trademark for those bunch of people dancing in the barat. You just have to lie down and be a snake, rest the fellow mates will see.

After the Barat arrives at the wedding ceremony, there is a ceremony of Jai Mala or Var Mala. Jaimala is a wedding ritual in which, the bride and groom put fresh flower garlands into each other’s necks, followed by the exchange of gifts. Where the couple is busy performing the ritual, some of the family members are still busy in doing their idiotic dance at the dhol beats. And now many different types of Jai Malas are done. I remember once the bride and groom were made to stand on a stage and that stage went 50 ft high, to show the whole world that another couple is getting married. But has anyone thought what would be going in the couple’s mind at that moment. Why the hell it was necessary to take us too high when this ceremony can be done at ground.

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Then there is a photo shoot of the lovebirds from different angles. No matter how tired they are, they have to give a cheerful smile at every single pose. Then the groom gets to know that his jutis (moccasin) are stolen by his sister-in- laws. Cheers for this guy, now he has to walk barefoot in the ceremony and to get back his jutis, he has to pay a wholesome amount of money. Finally after some negotiation and pleading, he gets them back.

And now the final round –

The SAAT PHERE –  one of the most important features of the Hindu wedding, involving seven rounds around a pious fire lit for the purpose amidst the Vedic mantras

The wedding couple is blessed to be together for next 7 births and vows made in the presence of sacred fire are considered unbreakable.  

And then after a total of around 10 hours of celebration, the newly wed couple are blessed by both the parents. It’s the last day on which groom smiles and bride cries.

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These were some of the moments that I enjoy during a marriage.

Hindu Marriages are the meeting of two soulmates who live together forever, no matter what the situation will be. They both hold each other hands and promise to be in each other ups and downs. Moreover, it is the fusion of two different families.

“A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person.”– Mignon McLaughlin

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